#NO BECAUSE THE HATE I HAVE FOR THAT FUCKING CARTMAN AND WENDY SHIT MAD ME WANNA THROW UP

[thelovelybitten]

vera's first watch of south park -- season four (part 2)

jfc i want 2 unalive... slowly

EPISODE 6: THESE THE BOYS ARE SO FERAL BYE messing w the sub with switching names NO KYLE IS SICK :’((((( MY POOR BOY NOT BUTTERS HE’S SUCH A CUTE CARD I LOVE BUTTERS SM miss information…. bffr garrison writing a SMUT FIC BYE MDFNVIFDMIMMVS miss information BYE STAN IS TRYING 2 HELP there’s only so much natural herbs can do :’( “KYLE’S MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD” SO TRUE SO TRUE CRYINGGGGG “I’LL GIVE HIM MY KIDNEY I’LL DO IT” stan would die for kyle and that’s on god babe not cartman being the only person in south park that matches kyle SMH kenny and cartman being actual kids ofc cartman won’t give it up “how much is ur life worth to u, kyle” cartman u fucking JACKASS if kyle dies i’m gonna be pissed stan worried abt kyle :’(((((( kenny >:( rightfully so garrison just come out as gay babe it’s not that hard clyde and tacos >>>> kyle’s life this is so fucked ew oh stan is serious he’s gonna get his kidney i forgot abt cartmans pig cartman is so smart okay that kinda slayed stan DON’T CRY “nobody cares if i die” KENNY THAT WAS OUTTA POCKET BUT ALSO SO TRUE MY SON “I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS BULLSHIT. SCREW U GUYS I’M GOING HOME.” PIANO FALLS ON HIM :’( very cartman of u kenny OH THEY KILLING HER OOF wait how is cartman not dead ?!?!?!/! his whole ass kidney was cut off by an eight year old oh they defo put his kidney into kyle’s bod but faked it for cartman epic EPISODE 7 Chef winning U GET THEM KING. Ending racists PERIOD who TF is this teacher Cartman winning debates ??? Weird Oh LMAO THE CLASS AGREES HES A RAT MY FUCKING FAVE KIDS ON TEAM CHEF !!! WENDY, BEBE, CLYDE AND BUTTERS. ICONS Stan obvs on his uncles side but BIG BOO WENDY GET THEM BABY WENDY TELL UR MAN HES AN IDIOT STYLE VS WENDY AND CARTMAN ??? oh this abt to be good cartman tho… fat boo Chef schooling the kiddies (style respectfully) WENDY PROTECTING STYLE SO REAL THUMBS DOWN CARTMAN BOOOOOOOO NOT THE KKK 💀💀💀💀 THE MAYOR RLY DIDNT DO SHIT oh crap leaving it up to the kids WHACK Wendy and cartman in the same frame is just giving me the ICK NO WENDY DONT LAUGH ALL CUTELY AT HIM EW no bc cartman and Wendy together makes me physically I’ll wtf KENNY EATING THE MINTS “FUCK YOU” so real “I don’t think we stand a chance in this debate bc Wendy’s leading the other side” “Dude, ur just saying that bc she’s your gf” TRUE AND REAL Kyle so real for that omg OH SHIT KENNY NOOOO HE EXPLODED NO CRYING not Wendy & Cartman again LORD ARE U TRYING TO TEST ME I WANNA OFF MYSELF WHY IS TREY AND MATT GIVING WENDY AND CARTMAN AN ENEMIES TO LOVERS ARC HES EVERYTHING SHE HATES AND VICE VERSA STAN PLS COME COLLECT UR GF IM GONNA THROW UP MY DINNER NOT THE HAND TOUCH IM UNALIVING I CANT I FUCKING HATE IT HERE NOT WENDY FANTASIZING CARTMAN I WANNA SKIP IT SO BAD BUT I NEED TO HAVE AN HONEST FULL REACTION NOT THE ROLL DOWN THE HILL WENDY WOKE UP IT WAS A DREAM THE LORD SAVED ME FROM THIS HELL Wendy me too bc what the fuck Dunks head in water me too Wendy seeing cartman everywhere and haunting her NOOOOOO Wendy “please don’t let this be happening” I WISH IT WASNT BABY GIRL This KKK stuff is weird “BEBE IM ATTRACTED TO CARTMAN” Bebe IMMEDIATELY SCREAMS THATS MY DAUGHTER SHES THE MOOD no but Bebe is me rn BEBE NO DONT TELL HER TO KISS HIM ?!1?1!1) THE FUCK ARE U DOING Wendy PLEASE DOR THE LOVE OF GOD DONT I DONT NEED THAT IN MY BRAIN PLEASE IM BEGGING WHAT WOULD STAN THINK ??!?!? WENDY ARE U DELULU STANS LOOK OF CONCERN AS HE LOOKS AT WENDY STUTTERING AND PANICKING NO WENDY ARE U FUCKING FOR REAL NOOOOOO STANS FACE NO IM BREAKING IM DESTROYED IM IN SHAMBLES HIS SAD FACE NO STAN IM SOBBINGGGGGG cartman feeling so smug abt Stan’s girl kissing him I know stan is gonna go HAM ON HIS ASS Stan still upset NO I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT CARTMAN IS ADDING FUEL TO THE FIRE TEASING STAN OH STOP IT STAN IS STILL SHOCKED STILL. S T I L L S T I L L S T I L L IM SOBBING AT STAN 😭😭 CARTMAN HAS FEELS FOR WENDY OH FUCK defo my least fave episode out of all seasons so far

[themadsquirrel09]

Tug-of-war

Fandom ☆ South Park 

Ship ☆ KenMan ♡ KenEric (Eric Cartman x Kenny McCormick) 

Characters ☆ Kenny McCormick, Eric Cartman, Stan Marsh, Liane Cartman, Mr. Kitty. A bit of Mr. Mackey, Wendy Testaburger, Kyle Broflovski and Butters.

Rating ☆ M

Summary ☆ One impulsive action can make the difference in the game of life and death.

Warnings ☆ Non-explicit adult themes, blood, swearing. They are kids here (11): it is mostly care, angst and fluffiness.

About it ☆ This fanfic works as a one shot, it is also part of an AU I’m writing in no specific order. I’m still trying to choose the name °u°’’’

☆ 3362 words ☆

With love: (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ Stan

“Here comes a candle to light you to bed.

Here comes a chopper to chop off your head.”

I hate this house, screw this!  

From the backyard, I still can hear the moans, the thuds, shit! I try to climb fast and get into the clubhouse; when I finally do, Mr. Kitty greets me. 

“This place is a mess, but good enough for one night, Kitty.” Something between a purr and a meow is his reply. I made a run for it as soon as I got home and heard them, but I knew this happened before; that it would happen again (and again), so there’s a mini fridge and a sleeping bag here. 

I search into my backpack for a distraction. All I have is food, a few books and, yes! My PSP! I smile at it but, when I hold it, my view gets blurred. I have to wipe the tears from the screen. 

Fuck, like my day isn’t shitty enough already! That PSP reminds me that I have Kenny’s will memorized. I asked for a copy to his lawyer, and read it over and over again, looking for something that I could use to get my way while he was in a coma. Now I know every word by heart.

I toss the PSP on the sleeping bag. Fucking Liane , she is the one to blame, because I can’t blame myself without breaking down and lately I just can’t get mad at Kenny.

“Goddammit!” I curse choked into sobs until I hear a noise, it is Mr. Kitty coming towards me at full speed, purring loudly. He pushes his head right into my hand; cats have funny faces, it makes me chuckle and calms me down. 

I grab some snacks, go for a Mountain Dew, and lean on the window frame; maybe to distract myself from what is happening inside the house, I think about Kenny, do you feel that way? Or were you just pissed at me because of something I did?

I replay in my head those words meant for me.

Eric, I never really liked you. But then, nobody does. You have no ability to feel, and you are going to die alone and miserable. It is only because I feel so sorry for you that I leave you my Sony PSP.

He calls me Eric. Even if sometimes I feel like I say his name over and over again, like a fucking parrot, he almost never does the same. I guess it means nothing, but why do I like it when he does that?  

That question makes me uneasy, so I go back to the will and get pissed. If you don't like me, then why do you feel so sorry for me? And then you let me have your only valuable possession... you know that you will come back to life, right? But maybe he thinks I don't.

“Kenny.” I go wide-eyed because I wasn’t expecting to say his name out loud, then I take a step back when I hear his voice calling me back! I peek through the window as if I’m going to find him outside. What I see is the snow covered in blood; I can feel the liquid dripping from my hair. When I blink, it is all gone. 

My heart hammers fast, but after a moment it slows down until it stops completely . Some weird sense of warmth comes to me. It surrounds me and gives me peace, then I feel it ascend; I look up just in time to see a shooting star, an impossibly big one. I feel my heart start again.

Shit, I better go the fuck to sleep.

Instead, I sit on the sleeping bag and take the PSP; when I touch it, I feel like Kenny for a second. By now I’m used to it, since that time his soul was stuck in my body, this happens sometimes. I wonder: what is he doing right now? , but to get my head out of that, out of everything, I play until I fall asleep with the PSP in my hands.

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

The only reason I talk to Liane the next day is because I need her to sign my permit and give me food, but I can barely listen to her lies, or even look at her as she showers me with unwanted affection.

I struggle my way out as quickly as I can and, maybe because of that, I’m the first one to make it to the bus stop. I'm pissed and sleepy so, when I hear footsteps, I prepare to shit on whoever is daring to cross my way but, well, fuck . Kenny’s big orbs lay on me.

“Hi, Eric.” I try to avoid his gaze, but I can’t. Does he go at a slower pace today? 

“Hey, Kenny.” My voice comes out hoarse, I didn’t get inside the sleeping bag yesterday.

“Dude, are you ok?” Do you really care, or are you just feeling sorry for me again? And he appears to be fragile, but is probably the only kid who could have had a worse night, and still asks me if I’m ok. 

“Hey, dudes!” Stan must have drunk an extra shot if he is so happy, that’s good, distracting. Soon Kyle joins us, but I’m so tired I can barely take my anger out on him. 

Since today we have this stupid school trip, I sleep most of the way; when I do, I have this nightmare: 

I’m standing in a puddle of blood. I move out of the way, but there is blood everywhere and, little by little, paralyzed by fear, I see how the thick dark liquid fills the space; when it reaches my ankles, I panic and start running.

It seems like I go nowhere and, exhausted, I fall on my knees. What is it about this blood that’s so hypnotizing? I can’t stop looking, but when it is reaching my elbows, I hear crying and snap out of it: realizing I'm about to drown, I throw myself back. That’s when I see something emerging from this dark lake. 

I get close, and take him in my arms: it’s Kenny, his eyes are shut, his mouth is open, red flows out of the corner of his lips. 

All this blood, it pours out of him.

“Kenny, wake up.” I try to clean his face with my sleeve. Useless . “Wake up, damn it.” I see his eyes twitch. The sobs turn into a sweet song, a light sound I can barely distinguish. I try to find the source, but it seems like it comes from everywhere. 

While I wasn’t looking, Kenny somehow got out of my grip: he is now floating in front of me and, just for a split second, I see the huge wings that hold him up. The blood now reaches my belly button, I get a hold of his wrists and try to pull him close.

“Wake up!”

With that last scream, I wake up, sweating, buried in Kenny’s arm, clinging tightly to his parka. We lock eyes. What the fuck, am I still dreaming? There’s a warm light that surrounds him. We remain like that for a second and all I’m doing is trying not to cry. 

“Hey, it’s ok, I’m here.” Weird. Those simple whispered words it’s all I need to hear and I’m able to breathe again. When he places his hand on mine, I remember where we are and sit up quickly, but my hand holds on. I feel him squeezing lightly, then he lets go, and the bus stops.

“Why are we visiting a lame-ass national park, again!?” I complain about it as I make sure to stay close to Kenny. He seems much more into this stuff than I do and it takes just a minute, while I convince Butters that some flower is edible, for him to disappear. 

“Kenny?” Where the hell did you go? He is out of sight, but I walk like I know the way, like something—someone?—is calling me. A few minutes later, with the strong wind whistling and rumbling, I see the blond boy kneeling among lilac flowers. His body is turned away from me. He faces the abyss.

I get close without him noticing, when I’m just a few steps away, I feel as if thunder growls under my feet. Without even thinking, I run towards Kenny, grab him by the backpack, and yank him with all my might. The floor crumbles. 

Part of the ground is swallowed by the depths, but we are both safe. I fell on my butt and Kenny lies unconscious. I drag him away from the shattered floor and, for a moment, all I feel is my heart pounding. The chunk of earth we were standing on is gone and Kenny should be dead (again), but he isn’t. Because of me?

I glance at him and his face twitches, it seems like he is about to regain consciousness. I panic and run. I don’t know why, but I run until I’m breathless. 

After a while, I feel like throwing up, fainting, maybe both. I stumble and grab onto something, shutting my eyes so the world will stop spinning. Two things happen at the same time: on one side, I feel better, like a weight is lifted from my shoulders; on the other side, I hear the violent and very familiar sound of puking, it comes from right beside me. 

It is Stan who emptied his stomach. What? Did Stan just throw up for me? Even if it seems impossible, it feels like it. 

So I ran to the other kids and grabbed Stan's hand without noticing. He lets me keep doing that while he tells Wendy he is alright. I steady myself, we glimpse at each other and smile, then I let go of him. He doesn’t know what just happened, but why else would he do this for me? The rest of the trip, I keep smiling like an idiot, feeling like I did something I really like. Back on the bus, I can’t help but flinch when Kenny sits beside me and rests upon me those tired, bright eyes.

“What is it, poor boy, did you see a ghost?”

“No, but I almost became one,” he mutters and I pretend I didn’t hear him.

“What did you say?” I reply, teasing, I know Kenny gets frustrated when people can’t understand him. He squints at me and I almost feel him inspecting my soul. Why can’t I just look away? Fuck.

“I said: thanks dude, your face looks like shit too!” He leans towards me, and I feel myself leaning backwards. “What were you doing last night?” I scoff, amused.

“If you want me to answer that, Kenny, then you have to tell me first, what were you doing last night?” He blinks, taken aback. I can finally avert my gaze and smile smugly. I got him.

“Whatever, like I care!” He says and it stings a little, however I can’t just tell him what happened. It seems like he feels the same. 

This pisses me off.

Fuck it, I’ll just tell him! But, when I look at my side, I find Kenny is sleeping. I pull him by the parka, so his head lands on my shoulder, then I close my eyes and lean on him. I fall deep in a dream of a memory:

The moon peeks through the window and illuminates the room, but my view gets blurred by the—oh, so expected—tears. This time there’s something different, though: the soul of a joyful boy is trapped in my body.

“What’s the matter? It can’t be that you are crying.” Shit . Listening to my voice in that sweet-toned ring just makes me cry harder. “Dude?” He insists and I can feel his worry running through my skin. I breathe, trying to calm down. 

“It’s stupid. I cry at night because I don’t have a dad.” I feel my face warming up at the embarrassing confession. Kenny takes control of my left hand; he reaches for my right hand and holds it softly.

“It’s ok. I’m here.” I smile.

Those words seem to unfold as I wake up. I have to check if it was Kenny the one who said that right now, but I see that he is still asleep, we are still leaning on each other. Nobody can know that he looks cute to me at this instant, that I can't help but press myself against him just for a second before I struggle to upright swiftly. 

I get paranoid about it, but the other kids are talking, screaming and playing. Nobody saw us . I turn, find Kenny’s sleepy gaze already on me and smile nervously. It feels exactly like when I do something bad: I’m afraid I’ll get caught. I have to fill the silence.

“Man, if I knew that trip was so lame, I would have stayed home.” I lie, I would have rather died. I shield myself with my backpack not knowing exactly what I’m searching for, so I take out the PSP and, when I do, it feels like those times Kenny is about to show himself as a ghost. My breath hitches and I feel cold; even if it is him, ghosts creep me out.

“Oh dude, I haven’t played that in so long!” He doesn’t seem to notice, though.

“Check it out, Kenny, I’m already on level 42,” I say as I hand the PSP to him.

“Are you getting your ass kicked or what?”

“Yeah. No matter how much I reinforce the gate, they keep getting in.” Suddenly, we are closer than expected and he shows me the way. We get so distracted by talking and playing, that I barely notice we are back in South Park, but when I do, I swallow hard. If I get home and the same that happened yesterday goes down, I might lose my shit and murder someone. Maybe I will kill myself. That’d be the best .

“If I stay at your place, we can beat this in just a couple of hours, you know? We can also repair our clubhouse a bit, it’s a cool place to hang out,” Kenny says, smiling. Why would you want to stay with me? Are you just feeling sorry for me again? Wait. Did I say that out loud? I’m about to panic, but he gives me a look like he is clueless. “What is it, you had other plans?”

Other plans? I see my corpse lying on the floor and I burst into laughter. I laugh not to cry and because it is too funny. It is impossible that someone like this exists! At first, he asks me what is it, but after a while, maybe because of how much I’m kicking, wheezing, struggling to breathe, he starts to laugh too; at me? Sure, but I don’t care right now.

“Eric Cartman! I said this is your stop, mmk?”

“Calm the fuck down!” I get to say between laughs, “I’m going, ok?” I stand up and turn to see the blond offering back the PSP, but instead of taking it, I grab him by the arm and pull him. He comes with me.

As Kenny said, it only takes us a couple of hours to finish the game, then we start to fix the clubhouse a bit.

“Dude?”

“Kenny?”

“Do you have a crush on Stan?” I feel my gut dropping.

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“I saw you holding hands; you guys look cute together.” Why does hearing him say that makes me feel like shit? I put the tools aside and go for the door. He follows.

“Cartman?”

“Shut up, Kenny!” I snap, turning to scream in his face, but when I do, I accidentally step on Mr. Kitty’s tail. He hisses, bites me and I back away. Being so close to the entrance, I lose my balance. 

About to fall from the tree, I reach for Kenny and he gets to grab me by the arm. For an instant, I see in him that determined expression he usually has when he is Mysterion. He throws himself back pulling me, so I fall inside the clubhouse, but land on top of him. 

“Fuck!” I get off of Kenny as quickly as I can, he gasps for air. I was crushing him! “Kenny?” He smiles, trying to be reassuring, but he is having a fit of cough, so I grab him, sit him up and get him something to drink. He holds his chest with his eyes closed; the coughs mellow as he breathes deeply. I just look at him. Kenny’s hood is off and it is not every day that I get to see his whole face. Do you really have to hide all the time? 

“Dude!” He exclaims after finally drinking a bit of the Dr Pepper. “I almost died.” And it wouldn’t be the first time today.

“It’s your fault!” 

“Fuck you!” He says to my face playful, and I find myself incapable of insulting him back. “We are ok now, right? I just saved your ass.”

“Yeah. Whatever.”

“About what I said: I don’t care who you like. Let me know if you need a wingman.” I stare at my hands and remember how they reached for Kenny this morning. Did I save his life? Well, he just did the same for me. “Cartman?”

“What? Oh, yeah. I’ll let you know.” 

“Cool,” he says, then he gets into the sleeping bag. “Goodnight.” Kenny falls asleep in a heartbeat. You are even more tired than I am, aren’t you? But I feel restless and keep wondering:

“What were you doing last night?” I ask him under my breath. There is no answer. I sit beside the sleeping bag and imagine we are some kind of warriors; I’m the one standing guard, maintaining a protective field with my wizard powers. 

I see Kenny’s matches on the floor. He probably dropped them when we fell. I take them, go to the window, and after declaring the area is enemy-free, I light one. What kind of kid looks so happy just by watching the fire?

Kenny’s will surface on my mind as the fire goes out on its own: Eric, I never really liked you. But then, nobody does. Then what are you doing here? Why would you want to be my wingman?

I light another match.

You have no ability to feel, and you are going to die alone and miserable.  

I kind of wish I could agree about me having no ability to feel, then I remember his hand reaching for mine in that dream of a memory I had today. 

“Shit!” The fire burns my fingers and I let go of the match, which falls onto the snow. 

I turn to look at Kenny. He sleeps curled up like a stray kitten. Dying alone and miserable, huh? Who else but you would know how that feels?

I get close and kneel beside him, then I light another match. Funny; I’ve seen his face illuminated by fire so many times the image is stuck with me.

It is only because I feel so sorry for you that I leave you my Sony PSP.

“You make no sense.” My mumbled words blow out the match. You make no sense, but neither do I! I can’t even put a finger on what made me pull him away from the abyss today. 

I smile at the thought of it, maybe I just didn’t want to be alone, on the bus, at the house. My eyes go to the floor, I feel like crying, but a sudden yank makes me gasp as I fall forward; Kenny is pulling me by the arm. 

“Eric.” He looks at me with half-lidded eyes, “Fucking sleep.” He commands groggily. I frown at him, he lets out a soft chuckle, and I get into the sleeping bag, wondering: for how long has he been pulling me away from falling to my end?

❅──────✧⋆꙳•̩̩͙❅•̩̩͙꙳⋆✧────── ☆ ──────✧⋆꙳•̩̩͙❅•̩̩͙꙳⋆✧──────❅

This is (definitely) not the end.

⋆✧────── ☆ ──────✧⋆

Final notes 🖊️

 🧡 I love this ship so much ❤️

Did you enjoy reading it? It sure was an amazing and weird experience writing this 🌠 It took me a lot of time mostly because I edit until my eyes bleed =u= (I started writing it and had the 1st draft on January lol)

A little of context ☆ The paranormal connection between Eric Cartman and Kenny McCormick is one of the main reasons I adore this ship. Eric says he sees through Kenny's eyes and feels like him on S06E12 ∣ A Ladder to Heaven; then Kenny's soul is trapped in Cartman's body for almost a month. 

The crying at night thing is also from the show, Eric confesses that on S11E08 ∣ Le Petit Tourette.

All kinds of support are really appreciated! ♡ 

If you want to help me keep writing, you can buy me a coffee here ☕

You can also commission me, here you have the info 💌

[weedle-testaburger]

Nice. Well I’m glad you’re doing okay anyway. I’ve been continuing with my amendments. Again. Also, With regards to those numbered asks I have a few. Numbers 1, 8, 9,14,19, and 23 respectively. Again I’m just curious.

Sure thing! I'm gonna mix and match with fandoms here I think if that's alright.

What OTPs in your fandom(s) do you just not get? I generally don't get ships where the characters have a very toxic and abrasive relationship (e.g. the Doctor and the Master, Lister and Rimmer in Red Dwarf, Kyle or Wendy and Cartman in SP, Lapis and Jasper in SU, Simon and Grace in Infinity Train or Deku and Bakugou in BNHA). I don't think shipping them necessarily romanticises abuse or anything, but I would never want a relationship where I have to second-guess if the person I'm with actively wants to hurt me and I really can't see look past that perspective on those kinds of ships.

8. Have you received anon hate? What about? Nothing fandom-related beyond 'you're stupid for liking kid's cartoons/Problematic media' kind of stuff from people outside a fandom, at least that I remember. The closest I think I've gotten was when people have occasionally gotten mad at me because they misinterpreted or took too seriously a joke I made in a tim watches post.

9. Most disliked character(s)? Why? With Doctor Who it'd probably be Mel (just on TV though, she's a lot better in the audio dramas), River and Clara; for SP I can't stand the edgy characters who just exist as an excuse for them to make bigoted jokes like Mr Kim or PC Principal; while I do think Jasper from SU is a good character, I think she's really unlikeable and don't get why a lot of the fandom are desperate to see the good side of her (besides that she's buff); in Evangelion I can't stand Mari because she's so seriously underdeveloped and boring compared to the other main characters and yet the writers had her end up with Shinji instead of Kaworu or Asuka; I really hate Chloe, Lila and Gabriel/Shadowmoth in ML; like everyone else I fucking hate Mineta from BNHA; and while I know it's the point of them, I don't like Belos or Boscha from TOH at all.

14. Unpopular opinion about your fandom? I've got a lot of those for a lot of fandoms lol. But I'll just state my opinion for Doctor Who because it's probably the most controversial anyway. I actually don't think the Chibnall era is a lot worse than the Moffat era, the latter had lows just as low almost as often; I think the main reasons it's more hated are that while the Moffat era had characters who he clung to and made exceptionally annoying to me, some people did like them, while the Chibnall era had few characters anyone likes.

19. What is the one thing you hate most about your fandom? Funnily enough, Stranger Things and Star Wars have inherited the one I had with the SU fandom for a long time- people too obsessed with bitching about things they don't like in it to appreciate the elements of the story I find really thematically resonant and interesting. I don't give a shit if you're annoyed about X inconsistency if I can latch onto how a character faces up to their psychological issues, and if you can't, that's your loss mate.

23. Unpopular character you love? I don't think I tend to latch onto unpopular characters so much as obscure ones actually. Among others, I have a big soft spot for Kevin Stoley from SP, Frobisher from Doctor Who, Fluorite from SU, Wrong Hordak from She-Ra, Toast from Bee & Puppycat, Puddle and the King from Summer Camp Island, Hollis from TAZ and the Cat from Infinity Train.

[heckinhacker]

lemme order uhhh some headcanons of craig, clyde, kenny and kyle reacting to their s/o always blushing around them

Craig, Clyde, Kenny and Kyle - their S/O is blushy around them headcanons! 

A/N: Idea’s so cute! Hope you like it! 

Just to be clear, they’re teenagers, around 18 years old, before anyone goes in and starts complaining that I write for children, ok? Better safe than sorry

Craig

Noticed even before you were dating. 

Well, now you’re dating because he found it cute and started hanging around you more so he could see your blushing face. 

ALWAYS stares, which makes you blush even more. 

Good. 

When you ask him if you have something on your face, he just bluntly answers “Cute.”

That’s...that’s it. Cute. 

Kisses your forehead, then puts hands in his own pockets, waiting for you to do the same.

“The same”, you ask? 

He waits for your one hand in his pocket, so you can hold hands. 

He’s cheesy, what can I say. 

Try to call him out, he’d be stubborn he isn’t. 

but he issss

He’s never surprised when he sees red on your cheeks. 

But he’s grateful for it.

“When I see [Y/N] blushing because me I feel sooooo happy.” He thinks to himself. 

He’s grateful to have you too. Like, in general. 

“Craig can you stop rubibng in our faces that you have someone? Rude.” Comments Clyde once as Craig stares at your b lushy face at the lunch. 

“Nope. Mind your own fucking buisness.” 

He answers, still shamelessly observing your munching, cute face. 

Don’t get me wrong, you can be as manly as you can be, but he’d still call you cute. No hard feelings. 

That’s how he is. 

Clyde: 

“Ohhh, [Y/N], so cute! But why are you blushing? Is it for me?~” 

Well not like you can answer. Obviously it’s for him. 

You’re not dating yet. Craig groans, Token rolls his eyes, Jimmy hisses. 

They’re so done with Clyde’s shit. And yours maybe too. 

Like, OBVIOUSLY you’re both into each other, Clyde knows, you know, but noone makes a move. 

“J-j-jesus, ju-just kiss a-a-already.” commented Jimmy, wanting to be over this. 

Your cheeks burn even more now. 

Tweek asks boys to be more nice to you. 

Specifically to you. 

Since bullying Clyde is a meme in your group. 

Clyde chuckles, not caring that the others are tired of his sheningans. 

“Well, maybe we should. What do you think, [Y/N]?” 

“Y-yes- NO?! I don’t know-!” 

Token snorted. “So it’s a yes or no?” he asks. 

You groan, hidding your face. 

“Be mine, [Y/N]?” Asked Clyde, wrapping his arm around your shoulders. You shake your head “yes”. 

“Finnaly” says Craig while standing up. “I was getting tired of your bullshit.” 

So you date for a while now, right?

And you can’t help yourself but to keep blushing around him still. You hate it, he doesn’t. 

He thinks it’s adorable that you’re still so shy around him! But would like for you to be more confident. At least around him. He wants to know you can trust him! 

You open up more, but when he places his hand on your hip, or just hugs you, or makes some suggestive comments, you blush like mad. 

You can’t help it!! 

And Clyde overuses it. 

Kenny: 

He’s touchy-touchy grabby-grabby with everyone. At the beggining. 

But your reactions were THE BEST. 

Grabs your butt? Blush. 

Plays with your chest, no matter how flat or big it is? BLUSH. 

That blush makes him crazy. In every way. 

He could NOT let you go, you’re his now. 

Takes his hoodie off just to kiss you on the lips to make your cheeks burn. 

Satisfaction runs over him. 

And the fact that you blush every time? He enjoys the hell out of it. You’re FUCKED. 

Main four asked Kenny to be less touchy with you around them. 

Kenny ignores. 

You ask him to stop because that makes others uncomfortable, he just snorts. “Not uncomfortable, jelaous. But if you say so...but I demand reward afterwards for being patient!” 

Another juicy blush. “S...sure.” 

“Bleugh. DISGUSTANG.”  - Cartman. 

“Come on...” - murmurs Kyle. 

Stan just sighs, which in response Kenny points his finger at him.  “Don’t be hipocritic, Stan! You and Wendy are all mushy-mushy, so me and [Y/N] can’t?! I’m offended, and you’re a stinky hipocrite!” 

Kenny won arguementation. But just held your hand, to keep blush present on your cheeks for the time being. As long as you have to be around others. 

Kyle:

At first, he’s sure you’re just sick, having a feaver. 

Well, halfly he’s right, your face is BURNING. 

But not because  you’re sick, it’s because you’re love-sick

He realises that thanks to his bestie Stan. Stan shakes his head and says directly to Kyle: “[Y/N is not sick, dude. They’re just blushing because of you! I’m sure of it!” 

Now it’s Kyle’s turn to blush. 

Only this time, as he realises. 

Generally he’s very, very smart, but realising someone as shy and cute would decide to dedicate their feelings for him? Damn...

That’s a big, big thing. 

After a while of thinking about it, he asks you out. 

This one chance to be happy with someone he won’t let Cartman ruin for him. 

He wants to be happy with you - and he will be. He’ll be damned if someone will ruin it. 

You don’t let them. Maybe you’re blushy, but you know better than listening to anyone else than Kyle in your own private stuff. 

So Cartman’s fucked this time. Heheh, check-mate, asshole. 

Never does anything that could make you uncomfortable, he even asks to hold your hand. 

But doesn’t ask for permission for kisses on the face. He knows he can do that, even though you blush after that. 

“You’re burning again, [Y/N].”

“I...I can feel that.” 

“I love you.” 

“...I love you too.” 

[madidraw]

If Stan really loved himself he'd dump Wendy and tell her to fuck off and leave her like the rotten garbage she is! Stendy is abusive and if the genders were reversed it'd be the same as Reylo, abuse only shipped by delusional fangirls who like innocent people to suffer. Terrible women like Wendy who are never punished lead to why MGTOW exists as a movement to liberate men!

Oh boyyyyyyyyyy where to even start

So I let you know, you decided to bug someone who doesn’t mind taking a part in a discourse at all. And oh well, I’m in a mood for rolling down with it so why not to pick up this trash-trap-anon then :DWarning: I didn’t watch the newest season and didn’t yet play TFBW so rip but google helps me with things I don’t knowI’d give you right, I doubt Stan loves himself and it was pictured not once not twice during the whole series. Not gonna argue about that.But where you decided that Wendy is ‘rotten garbage’? Oh that’s interesting. The more that you didn’t even said a word about Kyle in that post, and Kyle and Wendy are very pretty much similar folks :D From what I remember from the show, Wendy tries to help Stan and cares about him (like in that one episode where Stan was hoarding things for example). And her own character? She stands by woman rights, trans rights, fight against Cartman when he decided to make fun of breast cancer. She’s thinking twice before doing things, looking at herself, how she functions in the world, how she wants to function in the world. And when you’re in a relationship, you need to look at your own good too.So what if they are on and off every once in a while. They are like, u know, 10 years old, despite everything. And I know that kids in sp act like adults and adults are invalid but u know, sometimes u see the kids playing in the background with toys. Watching cartoon. Playing make-believe. They are doing with their relationship what they are doing with it cuz they are kids, so lol.UGH but noooww, we got to my absolute favorite part of your ask dear anon. Reylo.So, I dunno if you know cuz I know I have a few friends out there that simply like Reylo - because they fucking can and I won’t try to stop them, I’m fine with it - so I’m not talking a lot about Star Wars on my tumblr. But I’d tell you I don’t remember my life without SW. I was one of the kids who’s parents decided to let them watch those movies ASAP, and often. I remember Revenge of the Sith had a premiere in the cinemas and I remember I was mad that I didn’t go to the cinema for it (I guess I was too little). And oh boy, I fucking hate sequels. Starting with Kylie Ron, ending with Rey-what the fucking fuck way too lot - Skywalker. And I won’t shit on Reylo here cuz once again - I might hate it, but I have friends who like it so I won’t make their night fucking bad. I’ll just write down the facts from the movies.So, let me ask you.When did Wendy mind-torture Stan? When did she decide on purpose to make his life miserable? When she dumped him? Cuz I’d tell you, she didn’t dump him cuz she wanted to mess up with him. She did it for herself - to take care of herself and her needs. When did Wendy and Stan try to kill each other? Fought each other to death, actually?When did Wendy kill Stan’s father figure, mentor, and friends?When did Wendy commit genocide? (actually, lol, I remember Kyle commit genocide, and I guess you don’t have anything against this super-best-friend cuz u didn’t even try to say a word about him, protecting Stan from Wendy so greatly :D).

We don’t see minute-by-minute what happens in south park. But we know that Stan and Wendy do interact. A lot. Of course less than the group of boys do - cuz they are kids and kids usually stick to their own gender-friends. And this is only one of the examples. 

Kyle Ron and Rey don’t interact. We have a few of their interactions by force bond that wasn’t 100% hostile trying to kill each other right away (mostly cuz they couldn’t I guess lol) and basing on ROS there was not any more ‘nice’ interactions between them.In conclusion - I don’t care about what you think of Stendy. I know people shit on this ship but I like it and I don’t fucking care about the fact that you don’t. What I want to ask you tho, is how the fuck did you come up with the idea that Stendy is gender-reversed Reylo. Or how the fuck did you get the idea that if Reylo was gender-reversed it would be ok. Cuz it’s not and would never be, with the things they did to each other.

Please, learn what ‘abuse’ really means before you throw this card-word at somebody. You have no idea how you could actually hurt people by saying things like it. And mostly - just admit you don’t like Wendy and leave her character alone. She doesn’t get enough screentime for your shit.

[foxxygold-blog]

South Park High School Jokester

                                                       Chapter ~ 2

               Deciding to take up on the boys offer to show you around town, you sent a quick text to your mother saying you were going to be out later than planned. She sent you a quick text back, usual ‘k’ with a little heart emoji. Smiling softly, you left the message on read before hitting the power button to lock your phone before shoving it in your pocket and rejoining in the conversation and walk with the boys.

               “To be honest, most of the town is shit. However, the people in it make the place, a little less shitty? I don’t know how to explain that any better,” Stan muttered. He rubbed the back of his neck before giving a nervous chuckle.

               “Fuck the town, let’s talk about you. You just moved here the other day and scared the shit outta Butters and his parents and creeped us out today. Is that something you do often?” Kenny questioned, looking at you with what could only assume was some kind of smile underneath his winter clothes.

               “Well, here’s the thing. Warning, I’m probably about to overshare because I don’t know how to just stop talking about my personal life, ya know? Okay so like, I don’t know. My first thought was, let’s make a great first impression! And then my mind switched to, lets fuck with them if they like mom enough then surely they’d come back. I don’t know, it’s a thing my anxiety does is it’s like, don’t do this thing, they’ll hate you for it, but then my meds are like ‘who fucking cares do it anyway and make a GREAT TIME out of it’ because we only live once you know? Oh, I think I over shared again,” you paused. You could practically feel the cold sweat beginning to form on your back, what if they cared about you having anxiety and thought you were weird.

               “Oh okay, that’s cool. Well, if you need anyone to talk to you with your anxiety that is, Stan and I would probably be the best to come too,” Kyle smiled. You sighed, managing to relax and nodded your head, thankful they’d be willing to hear you out if you actually had a problem.

               “So yeah, I just thought, what could be the best way to scare the shit out of almost everyone, and by almost I mean Butters and his family for a fact, and my mother a little. She mostly gets mad. I was like yes, the squid hat for a fact, and my prop bongs. I’m not actually a drug user, you know, save form the average users over the counter prescription meds, but I don’t do heroin, meth, weed, or anything along those lines. I’m a good child of the lord,” you laughed, “so I set up my speakers as quick and started playing some anime opening that had become a meme in recent years and played the ear rape version, it felt like the whole house had an orgasm. You should know Kenny, the one that has people looking like they’re having a seizure.”

               Kenny sent you a finger gun with a nod of his head, indicating he knew exactly what you were talking about. As the entire group of you walked around the neighborhood and you were introduced to most of the boy’s families, it wasn’t long until a group of girls ran up to the group. You couldn’t help but feel nervous; wow all those girls were pretty. You watched them all talking to almost all the boys save for Cartman before the black haired girl in purple looked at your and smirked at Stan.

               “New lover already?” You felt confused, before laughing.

               “No, I mean. No offense Stan, good looking guy, sure anyone would suck your dick,” you patted his shoulder as his face turned red, “but I’m the new kid in town. I apparently scared the innocent boy named Butters when he and his family came over the other day and all these lovely people came over to see if he was lying. Jokes on them, he wasn’t. I’m kinda weird, just gonna say that now so you can bully me to my face, and not behind my back.”

               The girl looked confused before smiling nervously.

               “Dear, all of South Park is weird. You’re probably gonna fit in, and I doubt any of me or my girls will bully you. How come you didn’t tell me about the new kid? You’re practically smothering them, why not have girl time with us,” the black haired girl held out her hand.

               “Wendy, we invited and ran into them first.”

               “Yeah, but we got too them second, and second has always been the best since elementary school,” the blondie beside Wendy spoke up.

               “Fine, we’ll just do some introductions now and some later. Tomorrow is the last day of break, so Token is having a party at his place. Everyone who is here right now is me, Wendy Testaburger, the blonde girl next to me is Bebe Stevens, the brunette is Heide Turner, and there’s plenty of later we’ll introduce you too once school starts. Or,” she dragged on. She slowly turned to look at Stan before he cursed silently to himself.

               “Wendy, we got told we couldn’t come over due to what happened at last times party.”

               “Well, maybe new kid can be your way in,” Bebe questioned.

               “I have a name and it’s (y/n) thank you.” You interjected with a small raise of your hand, not exactly enjoying being called the new kid.

               “Shit, you may be onto something,” Cartman declared while smacking one fist into his other open palm.

               “What the hell are you talking about Fatass?” Kyle sighed, rubbing his forehead in irritation as if a headache was about to form.

               “We take (y/n) over to Tokens place; use them as our slave to get in. Make it a bargain. We’ll give you someone to help you do work tomorrow if you let us come party at your place.”

               “That seems a bit harsh to use (y/n) as a pawn in a skeem when they haven’t even been here for more than a week!”

               “Actually,” you spoke, kicking at the floor, “I wouldn’t mind, it means I don’t have to touch my room and I’ll get to see new people.”

               Everyone looked at you a bit surprised, Kyle almost looked at you with pleading eyes as if to say you shouldn’t even open your mouth and agreed to his stupid plan. Cartman shouted happily in joy and declared to the girls who had run into them that they’d all be at the party. You sent your mom a quick text, letting her know your plans for tomorrow. You explained to her in simple text format that you were going to help new friends set up a party, which wasn’t exactly a lie, or the total truth of your situation! So things should surely work out.

               The girls parted on their way only after making sure you would take part in the party yourself, have some drinks and dance with them and meet more of their gal pals. Butters, wanting no part in the current plan, though promised to be at the party, departed on his way home with the excuse of last-minute winter break homework. The other four pulled you off and dragged you toward Kyles house and into his large car. You screeched as you went running, crying “GUN” before running, causing some of the boys to freeze and even drop to the floor. You smirked as you easily hopped into the shotgun seat and stick out your tongue.

               “Shotgun that is,” you hummed. Stan, Kenny, and Cartman all glared at you while you just smiled happily like a little kid who had not done a single thing wrong. Kyle just chuckled to himself before hopping into the driver’s seat and starting up his car. Kenny and Stan decided to sit together in the back while allowing Cartman all the space in the middle by himself. After everyone was buckled in, Cartman got dangerously close as he leaned in glaring at the side of your face.

               “Alright listen here, new kid---.”

               “It’s (y/n), Cartman,”

               “Yeah, whatever new kid--.”  You groaned loudly before Cartman spoke up again.

               “We get to Tokens lavish house, and you’re going to play the broken and depressed damsel, or knight, your choice.”

               “Broken and depressed, got it, already got that down since I was born,” you joked.

               The boys looked at you worried save for Cartman before you panicked.

               “Kidding, I’M KIDDING!”

               “No matter what bargain he gives us, you counter back with, you won’t do anything unless he lets US in tomorrow night. Got it, new kid?”

               “(y/n),” you corrected.

               “GOT IT?!” Cartman yelled at you, causing you to flinch and Kyle to swerve a bit on the road as he was driving.

               “I fucking got it, jeez, you’re gonna make Kyle crash,” you cried. Cartman sat down with a smug smile on his face. You sighed softly rubbing your arm before trying to melt into the seat and disappear. You sat in silence for the rest of the ride, watching houses pass by in a colorful blur just outside of the window. The car was pretty clean saving for a wrapper from some fast food joint and some straw wrappers. You began to pick at your nails a bit while thinking before feeling the comforting vibration of the car stop beneath your body and you re-registered your eyes to notice the big, nicely gated house. Oh, so he was a rich boy. Maybe you could push some certain buttons if you needed too.

               “Alright, we’re here, let's hope we don’t get banned and put on restraining orders,” Kyle grumbled. Undoing your seatbelt, you carefully popped open the door and hopped out, taking in the fancy black gate and watching where it connected to a cement fence that couldn’t be too easily climbed. You followed the boys up to an intercom system that must connect to the house. Kenny quietly pressed the doorbell button twice and everyone stood to wait for an answer.

               “Hello, who is this?” Came the voice form the small speaker just beside the doorbell button.

               “Heyyy, Token,” Stan spoke nervously after pushing down the talk button.

               “You aren’t invited nor are you being let in tomorrow night! Not you Stan, and none of your other three friends,” Token barked loudly.

               You quietly shoved Stan aside softly and pushed down on the button that was titled speak just below it and felt nervousness creep up on you.

               “Um, h-hello?” Damn you, you stuttering devil!

               “Who is this..? You don’t sound like any of the others if this is you guys pulling a voice prank I’ll get you arrested!”

               “No! Oh, god no, none of them have the voices to even sound close to mine, I’m too flawless,” you joked nervously, “I’m (y/n), the new kid who just moved in. I don’t know these guys that well, but they seem like nice people, could you let them go to your party tomorrow?”

               “Oh, you don’t know the half of our history. Besides, the last party they trashed my house, I was grounded for weeks,” Token scoffed. You glared slightly at the boys who all looked guilty but Cartman.

               “Look, how about we break a deal between us. I’ll, I don’t know, run errands with or for you for your party and you let them come? I’ll pay for anything they break if you let them in too and I’ll take all the blame.”

               There was silence on the other end for a long time. You felt dread crawl across your skin, had you just ruined their chances? You let go of the speak button and felt sorry for the boys, about to turn and apologize till you finally got a response.

               “Fine, but anything they break tomorrow you pay what it cost and a tax my family deems appropriate, got it?”

               The boys cheered happily, all of them focusing on the fact that they were allowed into the party tomorrow night before you felt dead on the inside. If they broke anything expensive tomorrow night? You were honestly going to kill all of them. You reached out to the button with a smile, forcing yourself to sound happy for your new friends.

               “Deal, what time you want me over here tomorrow? Come over about two or three in the afternoon, the party is at seven. Oh, and it’s just you coming tomorrow, don’t bring any of those losers with you.”

               “Fair,” you stated. The boys yelled in anger and disagreement before you glared at them and put a finger to your mouth, signaling them to shut up.